‘Twas a dark and stormy night, and Tobermory and Mahal did hide inside their house. Careful they crept, for nothing slept, as it was 6pm and the house was messy.
A strange potion Mahal had on her hair, which required application of large amounts of water to remove. And lo! She stepped into the cupboard whence water falls from the strange metal appliances, and proceeded to swear most vigorously and foul.
Indeed, the hole in the floor by which water was required to exit the premises was denying its’ function, and stained and musty water was being regurgitated back out. This was suboptimal, and Mahal didst complain most vigorously, to the murmurs of a worried Tobermory. The crisis worsened, as it proved no sink in their abode was of a mind to dispel it’s contents, anywhere but back into the small cubicle Mahal had so hastily vacated.
This potion was of a fearful sort, and needed removal in short order, lest it permanently ruin the hair of our fair maiden. Or not so fair, as this potion was of the sort intended to darken it.
Thus, Mahal went through many trials, tribulations, and buckets of water poured down the latrine, as she endeavoured to remove this potion from her hair. Her worried knight, meanwhile, contacted the ruler of their humble abode, who laughed most mightily and agreed to send a Champion around next day.
This was all very well, but left our Mahal in something of a state. What could be done?
Cold and windy and wet the night was, yet Mahal strode into the rain with her brave knight. Clad only in a bathrobe was she, but braved the elements nonetheless: the sole remedy for her plight lay in the garden hose, which her Knight duly applied. Cold indeed she was, yet they persevered until all traces of the potion had departed.
Quickly then they returned inside, to the warmth of the heaterside and the tempered query of the fractious beast that shares their home. Loudly it demanded why the cold had been let in, and why tempers were so fractious, for lo! it’s sleep had been disturbed!
Mindful of the trials that inevitably flow from such a great personage as a distressed cat, our good lady and her knight reassured the beast that it could return to it’s slumber. Rumbles echoed from it’s lair as it sunk back into repose.
Then didst they employ the wonders of communication, submitting a message to their brave comrades that a couch on which to lay their heads would be appreciated. Such a saviour was found! And our heroes departed their abode.
The road from the abode to the home of their saviour was long indeed, and the weather most foul. Fortunately, the chariot was well equipped for such weather, containing such marvellous facilities as windscreen wipers and a heater.
Our heroes considered themselves most fortunate.
Sadly, our heroes are not in luck this night. For, many miles from home, and far from their destination, a wiper snapped. And inevitably it was the one required by Mahal, our heroine, to see her road.
Luck was at hand, in the fortuitous acts of our brave Knight Tobermory, and the presence of a gas station from whence to acquire that marvellous fix, known to us only as duct tape. One suspects so great an object must have many names and titles in it’s own lands; so great a thing must indeed be highly praised!
Safely did our heroes reach their destination, and rued the fact they left their beds that morning. Surely, Mahal must have exited on the wrong side…